Family Forward of Texas provides these tips. Copyrighted¾ 1998.
 |
A
Parent’s Job |
In very simple terms, a parent’s job is guide children’s growth from the absolute dependency of infancy to the ability to be independent, interdependent adults. Figuring out how to get children from “here” to “there” is the tough part!
At
every age and stage of development, children seem to present a new set
of tests: to challenge on the one extreme, or too lenient with them on
the other. The Middle Way Parent Program invites parents to discover the
attitudes and skills that will allow them to develop and maintain balance
in their parenting efforts.
|
Parenting
Extremes |
Parents
who attempt to hold all of the power in the home tend to be very controlling
and harsh. They demand that their children do as they are told.
Unfortunately, they end up spending a lifetime fighting their children.
Worse still, they assume this situation is their children’s fault. “If
they would just do what they’re supposed to do, I wouldn’t have to be
angry all of the time!” Parenting
under these conditions is hard work, and it leaves children ill prepared
for the challenges and relationships of adulthood. Often these young people
become very resentful and rebellious.
Parents
who give children free reign, on the other hand, are often bowled over
by their high energy and demands.
Some want so badly to protect their children from being hurt, disappointed,
or angry that the allow them to simply do as they please.
Too soon, these two-year olds and 16-year olds who have not been
given boundaries or experienced consequences for their behavior are in
charge of the family. It’s
not unusual for these parents to feel like hostages in their own homes! These parents, too, can quickly assume the children are at
fault. “I’ve bent over backward
to give these kids everything, and this is how they act ¾
this is how they thank me!” Again,
everybody loses. There is no harmony in the home, there is no basis for
a parent-child relationship, and children fail to receive what they need
to succeed in the adult world.
|
The Middle Way |
Children
don’t come with built in self-control and adult capabilities; it is a
parent’s job to teach them! The
way in which these lessons are taught affects day-to-day life in the home,
how parents and children feel about one another, and ultimately the kinds
of adults the children become. Rather
than focusing upon “fixing” children, The Middle Way, provides
parents with a safe environment, encouragement, knowledge and skills they
need to transform their own behavior towards their children. Out
of these personal changes come remarkable changes in the children’s behavior!
|
The Four C's |
Caring,
communication, consistency, and consequences are the basic foundations
that the classes are built upon.
